Some time ago I was asked to attend a parent-teacher conference for my daughter with her team of teachers. She was in seventh grade at the time. I expected the meeting to be about some missing work, but when I noticed the school guidance counselor, I realized this was about more than missing assignments.
During the meeting, the teachers explained the way my daughter’s emotions changed drastically throughout the day. I always knew my daughter had a big heart and easily showed a range of emotions; now it seemed that this was having a negative effect on her daily life. Through counseling, we discovered a diagnosis of emotion dysregulation. Emotion dysregulation refers to the inability to regulate the range and intensity of feelings around outside stimuli and internal thought patterns.
Focusing on my daughter’s needs helped me view my students with new eyes. I began noticing that my classroom was filled with emotions. Students are navigating their thoughts, feelings, and relationships with others in tandem with their academic learning. Emotions are complicated. They can be gentle, uncertain, enjoyable, and challenging. Our students’ emotions are affected by the classroom community and their individual stories.
Untangling Worries with Picture Books
I learned the way my daughter’s thought patterns often began with worries. I saw the same trend in my classroom, and I began finding picture books about worries and sadness. The literary characters I was discovering and their stories became mentors for my students and opened doors for conversations within our community.
We read Jack’s Worry and then Ruby’s Worry. These books allowed us to make connections between the books and compare the characters’ journeys. These two literary characters “normalized” worries and led us to discussions in which we shared our own worries after making a list in our writer’s notebooks. I had the students write first so they could put their thoughts in a safe space, and then all of them chose to pick one worry to share in a class discussion.
I realized that most of us worry, but we talk very little about what to do when we worry. This discussion is important to making our community a safe learning environment. The following books helped us continue to understand worries as part of being human and know what to do when we worry or a friend feels worried.
I’m Worried by Michael Ian Black
Potato is worried. Potato wants to be reassured nothing bad will happen, and his friends, a girl and a flamingo, can’t do that. Instead they share bad things that have happened that turned out okay, with the message of enjoying the present.
Brave Molly by Brooke Boynton-Hughes
In this wordless book, Molly wants to return a book to a classmate, but her worry prevents her from doing so. As she walks through her community, the worry grows, but when she speaks back to the worry, she finds strength to return the book.
When Sadness Is at Your Door by Eva Eland
Sadness is represented as a light teal ghostly shape that surprises our main character. She guides readers to welcome it, sit with it, and name it. By spending time with it, the worry can go away.
Whimsy’s Heavy Things by Julie Kraulis
Whimsy recognizes she has heavy things, and sweeping them under the rug doesn’t help. She tries other strategies, but the heavy things stay. She discovers that breaking them into smaller pieces with a friend lightens how she feels.
Wemberly Worried by Kevin Henkes
Wemberly worries about everyday things constantly. Her family tries to tell her she worries too much and encourages her to stop, but she continues to worry about almost everything she looks at. She finds comfort in a new friend at school who is able to shift her thinking.
Thank Goodness for Bob by Matthew Morgan and Gabriel Alborozo
Max worries a lot, and everyone knows it. Max doesn’t know how to share his worries, and people around him are uncertain about how to help him. He finds comfort in Bob, his dog. He talks to Bob and accepts that worries don’t stop completely.
The Don’t Worry Book by Todd Parr
Worries are defined, examples are given, and strategies for working through worries are shared in a fun, direct, kid-friendly format. A book with a few giggles too.
Perfectly Norman by Tom Percival
Norman grows a pair of wings and wears a coat all day long to hide them. He finally finds the courage to tell his parents about the wings. His parents embrace this new knowledge with love, and he discovers that lots of other children have them too.
Ruby’s Worry by Tom Percival
Ruby has a yellow worry she tries to ignore, but it continues to grow. She doesn’t realize that her continued thoughts help the worry grow. When she meets a new friend with a worry and reaches out to help him, her own worry shrinks.
Life by Cynthia Rylant and Brendan Wenzel
The world’s animals and landscape tell a story about life not always being easy and how there will be new paths to take. During these moments there are things to remember—things to love, protect, and learn to trust. A beautiful reminder that things change.
How to Be a Lion by Ed Vere
Leonard is not your typical lion and isn’t fierce. He likes to write poems and isn’t accepted by the other lions. Through poetry and words he fosters a plan for showing his pride that there isn’t only one way to be fierce.
The Day You Begin by Jacqueline Woodson and Rafael Lopez
Sharea has all the thoughts and worries about being new and different in a new classroom. Angelina begins to share her story, and they connect with each other, pushing the worries aside.
When You Are Brave by Pat Zietlow Miller and Eliza Wheeler
Brave is modeled through the story of a family moving. The little girl has feelings of not wanting to do things because of sadness and worries about what is ahead. Courage becomes the change agent as the family arrives at their new home.
Jack’s Worry by Sam Zuppardi
Jack doesn’t want to get out of bed because he has a teal-blue worry with him. The worry grows in size, but when he finds comfort in talking about his worry with his mom, he is able to go on with his plans for the day.
Everyone experiences worries. When I didn’t know what to do on our journey at home with my daughter, I discovered picture books to help. She found comfort in the ideas presented when the world didn’t make sense to her. Watching her response helped me think about front-loading conversations with my students about worries in hopes of being proactive and showing them that worries can be managed.
