The Big Fresh September 21, 2013 Say Yes

For others, reading and writing is an ordeal to be endured.  For these students, completing an assigned book or essay is simply something to get done and over with. We’ve all worked with these students. I certainly have. I can’t bear it when I hear a student moan with dread or say, “I hate to read!” Because I truly believe it doesn’t have to be that way.

How can we teach children that reading and writing can be a peaceful, happy, soothing place to go?

I do know one thing for sure: in terms of literacy, we need to always say yes. As parents and educators, we need to encourage whatever it is that will make literacy a pleasant experience for young learners.

I try to do this at school. If a student hits his classmate and gets sent to my office, I work through the reasons for the violence and anger, hand over tissues to soak up furious tears, and then I say, “Do you want to read a book together?” The expression on the face of the sad and sorry boy changes immediately. He gives me a tentative and disbelieving “yes?” Then he crawls into my lap and lets me read to him, a story about a pigeon who can’t seem to get along with anyone until the right friend comes his way. Yes. Let’s read together.

If I need to cover a class for a teacher, and students aren’t sure how to act with the principal in their classroom for a long stretch of time, I ask if they want me to read to them. They gather around and listen as I read, their eyes wide and calm. If they ask me to read another book before they have to start something else, I say, Yes.

I say yes at home with my own children, too.  If my daughter wants to slip away for a bit, nestle down with her beanbag chair, and asks me if she can have a Popsicle while she reads, I say Of course.  Yes.  I try not to think about how she might drip red sugar on her chair.

If my son–who swears he doesn’t suck his thumb anymore–is quietly reading a book before sleep and his thumb slips accidentally between his lips, I think, It’s okay. Yes. 

When my children are tired at night and they ask if they can paint, and I want to say, “We’ll do it later,” because I dread the mess they’ll make at the kitchen table, I muster up patience, suppress my sigh, and say, Yes. I hand them pieces of clean, white paper and the box of watercolors and paintbrushes. I give them little cups of water to clean their brushes. As if by magic, they suddenly go quiet and calm as they write and draw and think. They hunch quietly over their work in deep concentration. When they finish, I ask, “What does that say?” and they tell me about their pictures.  I always marvel at their simplicity, beauty, and perfect truth. This is you, Mommy, and you are tired.  This is me and Daddy playing baseball. This is my sister, and she’s really annoying, but she tries not to be, because she knows I get in trouble when I yell at her. They are proud and calm as they tell me their stories.

Reading and writing is also an escape for me, and my family knows it all too well. My husband knows when my patience is running thin or I’m worn out from a day of hard decisions. I’ll say, “Can I just read for awhile?” he knows what that means. Yes, he says, and folds the laundry so I don’t have to. Or I’ll say, “Hey, why don’t you take the kids down to the park? I just had this idea I want to write down.” He smiles indulgently and says, Yes.

He understands that literacy is a peaceful place for me. As parents and educators, we understand this as well. We all need breaks, and literacy is an excellent way to find that escape.

When a quiet time to read or write is needed, say yes. If we do that, we can teach our children literacy can be a happy, restful place as they grow into adults.

This week we’re focusing on connecting student research and the Common Core. Plus more as always — enjoy!

Free for All

In this article from the archives, Chris Lehman shares an unlucky 13 ways to turn kids off to research:

http://www.choiceliteracy.com/articles-detail-view.php?id=1584